Tuesday, March 30, 2010

sucks. everything.

not that i can't wake up or anything in the morning. i just can't find the strength to get out of bed and wash up and change and go to school. so tiring.

and then i keep finding faults with others when i'm not exactly perfect myself. i can't help it. i'm trying to be real nice.

but i really dun like ppl who are like so obsessed about relationships and stuff. i mean, come on man, how old are they only. so young date what shit lah. like what's the whole point if they know they're gonna break up sooner or later. its not like that will be their lifetime partner right? isn't it rather dumb? when they know that they're not actually truly serious about the other person but they think that they are?

my sis lah. and that stupid guy from church whom i dun even like. he's so short and weirdly proportioned and weird and disgusting. like wth. wads with her taste. anw she's only sec 1 and she wants to do this kind of crap when she can't even get her studies right. my parents should just confiscate everything lah. mp3, laptop, phone. she's super immature and spoilt and inconsiderate lah. doesn't even spare a thought for my parents. and then she still can say wads wrong with loving someone, its not like i can control it. like wth. ITS NOT EVEN LOVE FOR GOODNESS SAKE, ITS JUST AN INFATUATION. argh. sometimes i really wonder how can ppl be so dumb. seriously, young ppl these days....haiz

you know it makes me feel as though i wanna be super nice to them to make up for the way she treats them. but like i keep thinking that they only care about her and dun relly care about me so wads the point of trying to be fillial when my efforts won't be appreciated? it just sucks.

i saw my childhood freind's mum and his sis on fri after dinner. and then i just felt so depressed all over again. missing those days when his parents were still together, when we were in the same church, when we were good friends. super good. probably the best friend i ever had so far. but its over. i miss those times.

you never know how much you miss someone and how important they are to you until they're gone. its true.

and now all i can do is regret. those decisions. that separated me from them.

i just realised. i really shouldn't have come to a triple sci class. i shouldnt be in 4C at all. it sucks. those "friends"...they aren't even your true friends. cos you dun treat your friends like that. they have no idea wad it means to have friends. real friends. friends who'll stand by you, who'll place you before themselves, who really listen to you when you're troubled. or maybe i'm just not good enough for them.

Posted by chris:) at 6:56:00 PM